coping with stillbirth, subsequent pregnancies and parenting after a loss.......my means of survival, my ode to Alfie, my wee man.
Our Alfie moto, Don't. cry because its over, smile because it happened.
Our Alfie moto, Don't cry because its over, smile because it happened.Dr Seuss
Sunday, 15 July 2012
206-7 glorious
Happy days, no matter the weather or the midges - kids are playing hard and sleeping hard...
Plenty chocolate consumed, crocheting done and lots of outdoor fun.
Gonna try running the morn.....wish me luck it aint easy running on forest tracks.
Friday, 13 July 2012
203-5 - what a week - call Nurse nancy
Finally, Finally the kids slept in their own beds from regular bedtime last night, since last sat we have been sharing with either one of them - then to finish it wed night we ended up all in bed watching 'underground Ernie' (my current earworm). We've got Susan Lambert to thank for that new current viewing obsession.
Yesterday we blew this Popsicle joint and spent the morning at Muddy Boots, weather not raining, not shining either. Kids were happy and Momo and Muma got coffee and scones. I think it may have been too much for Mini Haha - she took a huff
Yesterday we blew this Popsicle joint and spent the morning at Muddy Boots, weather not raining, not shining either. Kids were happy and Momo and Muma got coffee and scones. I think it may have been too much for Mini Haha - she took a huff
Then crashed oot on the sofa
Today we had a lovely morning at the park with Jinty and Daniel - it was freezing, but we were out in the air, what a joy to be pushing the pram and blethering instead of stuck on the sofa.
The boyos played at farmers loading the bucket while Jinty got the teas in - everyone happy!
Off on our holidays the morn, a week sans Daddy....be nice to be away but we'll miss him!
Tuesday, 10 July 2012
201-2 Geordie Munro......ya dancer
Dad was back at Starks Park the night! Happy days, apparently he really enjoyed himself. I've no spoken to my mum properly, but I assuming she also had a nice few hours to herself.
Dad also went for a haircut today - alone. He instigated it and mum left him there. He then walked home alone and let himself into the house (closely followed Taggart stylee by mum and her pal).
TWO huge moments, so pleased that things are finally on the up.
I had my haircut a few days ago, a fringe and a bob. I thought it was quite stylish and although enroute to my desired style not a bad look. Until my darling husband said it was cute and it reminded him of the woman from babe Pig in the city! See above........hmmm think I might rethink how stylish it is.
Kids have been poorly, high temps sore throats generally unhappy household. Not much sleep going on at the right times, for the last 2 nights I've fallen asleep with Archie until 10ish, then been awake until 12-1am, then back up with them at 5.30am. To combat the hellish illness I've been soothing sewing, tonight I finished the wee bloomers and made another sorbetto (addiction), this time took pleat out the front and added a lace panel at the top. White black spotty cotton white lace, black bias tape - not tried it on yet as I fell out with machine at last minute so unhemmed she'll stay until I get another ridiculous frenzied sewing notion. Nice to have quiet time, just me and radio 4 accompanied by the whir of the machine..... until 4 hours from now I am woken by someone shouting Mama - Thank goodness for my darlings xxx
Dad also went for a haircut today - alone. He instigated it and mum left him there. He then walked home alone and let himself into the house (closely followed Taggart stylee by mum and her pal).
TWO huge moments, so pleased that things are finally on the up.
I had my haircut a few days ago, a fringe and a bob. I thought it was quite stylish and although enroute to my desired style not a bad look. Until my darling husband said it was cute and it reminded him of the woman from babe Pig in the city! See above........hmmm think I might rethink how stylish it is.
Kids have been poorly, high temps sore throats generally unhappy household. Not much sleep going on at the right times, for the last 2 nights I've fallen asleep with Archie until 10ish, then been awake until 12-1am, then back up with them at 5.30am. To combat the hellish illness I've been soothing sewing, tonight I finished the wee bloomers and made another sorbetto (addiction), this time took pleat out the front and added a lace panel at the top. White black spotty cotton white lace, black bias tape - not tried it on yet as I fell out with machine at last minute so unhemmed she'll stay until I get another ridiculous frenzied sewing notion. Nice to have quiet time, just me and radio 4 accompanied by the whir of the machine..... until 4 hours from now I am woken by someone shouting Mama - Thank goodness for my darlings xxx
Sunday, 8 July 2012
196-200 happy developments
Lots of good things happening this week (must keep reminding myself of that, cause lots of other not so good stuff happening too!).
Good stuff.
1. Mum went out to the shops the other day alone and left my dad in the house......they both survived. A huge step for both of them, things are looking up.
2. Mum and dad went out for dinner last night with friends, my dad pointed to what he wanted on the menu. We can only assume he is reading well, as he chose 2 things we know he really likes and would have been a normal choice for him. Another big step, both on the communication front and on the life returning to some kind of normality.
3. Monica, the kids, Ants Kirsty and their kids and mum and dad and I are all going away for a wee break. The place looks awesome, and isn't far away so mum and dad can come up for 2 nights...anymore is too much right now. I am so looking forward to all of us being together. I also have plans to crochet and make more of a dent in the granny sq blanket, eat (always a popular activity in our family - already bought a side of salmon to do a gravlax, inspired by our current love of all things scandi/nordic), run run run to compensate for the eat eat eating I will be doing. Best of all we are going to play play play, I bought a raincoat today - not something I ever thought I would do, I am clearly becoming middle aged and sensible...this rain coupled with our extensive park/walking with pram routine kinda demands one.
The kids and I have had load of fun this week, we are getting into a nice rhythm of being free and easy. We are much more confident going out and about the 3 of us together sans car or other responsible adult ( Archie and I are finding our way in terms of managing behaviour in shops phew! finally).
Bad stuff
The crappy news is I have been rejected for a jobshare position at work. I have no idea why (well not true, I know fine well I don't fit the image of my work and as my track record re time off is piss poor the boss would drop kick my ass out the front door if he got a chance) - I should say official idea. Just a letter saying rejected. I can still go down to 3 days a week, however I won't get my 5 days back in 2 years time.....need to weigh up the pros and cons. Not sure how easy work will be knowing I'm persona non grata - social leper etc. The current ethos in the school is not really my cuppa so no love lost. So long as the kids are happy in my class, I have no major behaviour management issues and my exam classes are performing well, I'm cool with it. I will enjoy seeing the kids again and missing my girlie knitting club chats. Can't begin to think to far ahead right now, so will accept what universe has thrown at us once again and move graciously forward.
On the creative front - been sewing away. sorbetto tops are becoming a favourite. Just got a new lisette pattern which will be being made this week. I also made some bloomers, a wee trial idea for a craft fair, cute. I made them in Chinese satin with mint green bows.
I also wanted to say a quick thanks so everyone who is reading and not commenting - I know who you are! My stats tell me ha ha. I had an awesome chat with an old pal last night who mentioned she'd be keeping up to date with our news. So thanks so all lurkers for taking the time to catch up on our lovely dads progress......we appreciate the love!
Good stuff.
1. Mum went out to the shops the other day alone and left my dad in the house......they both survived. A huge step for both of them, things are looking up.
2. Mum and dad went out for dinner last night with friends, my dad pointed to what he wanted on the menu. We can only assume he is reading well, as he chose 2 things we know he really likes and would have been a normal choice for him. Another big step, both on the communication front and on the life returning to some kind of normality.
The kids and I have had load of fun this week, we are getting into a nice rhythm of being free and easy. We are much more confident going out and about the 3 of us together sans car or other responsible adult ( Archie and I are finding our way in terms of managing behaviour in shops phew! finally).
Bad stuff
The crappy news is I have been rejected for a jobshare position at work. I have no idea why (well not true, I know fine well I don't fit the image of my work and as my track record re time off is piss poor the boss would drop kick my ass out the front door if he got a chance) - I should say official idea. Just a letter saying rejected. I can still go down to 3 days a week, however I won't get my 5 days back in 2 years time.....need to weigh up the pros and cons. Not sure how easy work will be knowing I'm persona non grata - social leper etc. The current ethos in the school is not really my cuppa so no love lost. So long as the kids are happy in my class, I have no major behaviour management issues and my exam classes are performing well, I'm cool with it. I will enjoy seeing the kids again and missing my girlie knitting club chats. Can't begin to think to far ahead right now, so will accept what universe has thrown at us once again and move graciously forward.
On the creative front - been sewing away. sorbetto tops are becoming a favourite. Just got a new lisette pattern which will be being made this week. I also made some bloomers, a wee trial idea for a craft fair, cute. I made them in Chinese satin with mint green bows.
I also wanted to say a quick thanks so everyone who is reading and not commenting - I know who you are! My stats tell me ha ha. I had an awesome chat with an old pal last night who mentioned she'd be keeping up to date with our news. So thanks so all lurkers for taking the time to catch up on our lovely dads progress......we appreciate the love!
Tuesday, 3 July 2012
193-195 happy holidays
double trouble on the double space hopper today at the park. I heard from various sources that today was to be the one 'good' day this week. So 1st thing this am the kids were kicked out into the garden, I made them eat breakfast out there at 8.30am......normally I keep them in a while longer, but today I wanted them to make the most of the lack of rain. It was so close and muggy today, yet no real sun. On the plus side - dull as hell, I managed to get washing done and dried.
My lovely cousin Rosalin came for a visit at lunchtime - Archie went a but hyper due to attention (hmm like he doesn't get it from me!). Was lovely to see her playing with the wee ones.
My two are feeling loved up with mummy right now, they both keep playing at being baby cats and come meowing round my legs all day wanting mummy cat cuddles - too cute.
Lovely aft spent in the park with Barclay's bairnyard, great fun, good chat and lovely ladies xxx
Dad news = Archie tried to go out the back on sunday and dad said 'raining'. I asked him if he wanted some of his juice he said 'no, dinnae want it'. Some days I still feel in shock - and get a fright when I see him. Poor guy, xxx
Saturday, 30 June 2012
189-192 Sadie strawberry sensation
My wee strawberry sweetheart turned TWO yesterday, we had a lovely party and I've spent all week making, sewing, baking and basically i've had enough of strawberries.......except Strawberry Sadie.
It was just lovely to see everyone, all the wee ones running around. So glad my dad could come, I had a strange underlying feeling all day someone was missing, and I can only think it was my before the stroke dad. Shit how is it possible to miss someone when they are in the same room as you. xxxxxx
Blowing her candles out, her lovely GG in the background. |
Archie got his own 'digger' cupcake - THANKS Marty. |
Grandma Granda cheering Sadie's candle blowing abilities. |
It was just lovely to see everyone, all the wee ones running around. So glad my dad could come, I had a strange underlying feeling all day someone was missing, and I can only think it was my before the stroke dad. Shit how is it possible to miss someone when they are in the same room as you. xxxxxx
Tuesday, 26 June 2012
186-88 it all starts with picking up a pen.....
Dad picked up his pen and his newspaper and looked at his cryptic crossword - not that he was able to do any clues, but nevertheless the spark has been ignited. Another big step towards finding a way forward that brings satisfaction, happiness, quality of life and some pleasure and joy for all of us.
I have spent a considerable amount of time at mum and dads, mainly as company for mum and the kids are a great distraction for dad. His SOH has not diminished, if anything it has increased ( hmm I wonder if it is compensating, as one senses do when one fails?). Anyways on Sunday during the mad few hrs we had where I was #looking after' the kids, my dad and my gran aged 91 and her younger sister, Archie was playing in a wee cardboard box. He tipped over backwards an fell but was stuck in the box - my dad was beside himself with laughter, so good to hear.
We had another virtual meltdown today trying to locate the remote control for the tv, poor mum was stressing it would be stuck on cbeebies all night - I can understand her stress it isn't easy to tolerate high levels of mike the knight, kerwhizz, cloud babies etc, moreover the tv is a necessity for dad in the eve as he can't read anymore. No worries after looking everywhere, including, bin, fridge, bathroom cabinets etc - dad had it in his pocket!
All things strawberry has started heating up tonight, I started a garland, pug started the pinata and I did a wee crochet one too.......agh to all the cooking though, yikes better get my self organised.
I have spent a considerable amount of time at mum and dads, mainly as company for mum and the kids are a great distraction for dad. His SOH has not diminished, if anything it has increased ( hmm I wonder if it is compensating, as one senses do when one fails?). Anyways on Sunday during the mad few hrs we had where I was #looking after' the kids, my dad and my gran aged 91 and her younger sister, Archie was playing in a wee cardboard box. He tipped over backwards an fell but was stuck in the box - my dad was beside himself with laughter, so good to hear.
We had another virtual meltdown today trying to locate the remote control for the tv, poor mum was stressing it would be stuck on cbeebies all night - I can understand her stress it isn't easy to tolerate high levels of mike the knight, kerwhizz, cloud babies etc, moreover the tv is a necessity for dad in the eve as he can't read anymore. No worries after looking everywhere, including, bin, fridge, bathroom cabinets etc - dad had it in his pocket!
All things strawberry has started heating up tonight, I started a garland, pug started the pinata and I did a wee crochet one too.......agh to all the cooking though, yikes better get my self organised.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)